The pets of the house have changed a bit since last year. Zoe, who gave you an account of Christmas 2015 is gone. Skylar AKA Floofy AKA Flookfin Schiffin AKA FLLLEEEEWWWWWFFFIIEEE, the cat, is still mewing about. Image 1 Title

The newest addition is Archie, a dog we gave to Lily for her 10th birthday. Archie is a Lab/Pit mix, which means he looks like a small Lab most of the time, until he opens his mouth which is enormous. Seriously, I think Archie’s mouth hinges at his hind quarters. It’s kind of like watching a special effect from a B horror movie about dogs that turn into mouths that then chew on everything. And I do mean everything.

Anyway, Archie has fit into the family well, unless you ask Floofy, who is not a fan.

Q: Welcome to your first Holiday Letter! Are you excited?
A: I dunno. Can I chew on it?
Q: How are you liking your new family?
A: For the most part, they're great. The youngest one seems to think there is something on my face but under my skin. I like to chew on the fluffy one.
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Q: Yes, stop that. Why do you like chewing on things so much?
A: I dunno. It could stem from an incident from my puppyhood where my mother was caught on some train tracks and the train was coming and I had to chew through her collar and I just couldn't chew fast enough...
Q: OMG! That's terrible! Did she make it?
Q: Oh, you made the mom-train story up. How would you like to go back to the shelter?
A: Oh, um, HA! Just kidding. You are the best! Here feel free to chew on my favorite toy! (Archie drops what seems to be the remnants of a full-sized soccer ball in my lap.)
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Q: EW! Gross. That soccer ball wasn't your toy! Are you ever going to stop messing with the cat?
A: Unlikely. Best. Toy. Ever.
Q: Hey Skylar! How do you feel about Archie joining the family?
A: Hmmm...lemme think...let's say a group of people you thought were smart elected to bring a total moron with a big mouth into your home. Would you like that?
Q: Um, I think I can say from recent experience that I would not like that. Not at all. What are you gonna do?
A: Move to Canada.

Well, there you go. The Goodrich pets are as peculiar as ever, even when they are topical. Next year we hope to have a comprehensive list of items Archie has chewed into oblivion.